Posts By Dteb

“Freedom to Be Myself”

On February 15, 2023 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

My 12-step sponsee was writing about how recovery from addiction feels so free and good. I responded with the aphorism, “To be free of self is to be a self that is free.” I am not sure if this is original. I kind of doubt it. More importantly, I believe it is true.

Since I was probably about 14 or 15 years old, I have realized that there were several different “selves” living in me, some of which I liked and was proud of and some of which I didn’t and wasn’t. Over the years, the selves I didn’t like became more and more prominent. I suspect that this is not a totally unfamiliar dynamic to some of you. As someone has said, “We don’t become better with age, just more so.”

Speaking to some Jewish folks who had (at least tentatively) believed in him, Jesus said, “If the son sets you free, you are free indeed.” (John 8:36, my translation) Jesus had just spoken to these sort-of believers about freedom. Immediately, there was a problem. They thought that they were already free. After all, they were the offspring of Abraham. How could they be anything other than free.

But Jesus wasn’t buying it. He pointed out to these “free” people that anyone who sins is the slave of sin. This is certainly true of the patterns we call addiction, but it is true with any and every kind of evil thoughts and behaviors. Yes, we are free to sin. No, we are not free once we do. And with every wrong-doing, the next wrong-doing becomes soooo much easier. Perhaps our friends and loved ones—and even strangers—can see our chains and hear them rattling, but we cannot. Ignorance doesn’t make the chains unreal. Ignorance just makes us unreal.

But there is a way out. Jesus claimed to be that way. We forge our own chains, put them on, and then trudge through life, less and less alive. We forged the chains and put them on, but we can’t take them off. Addicts who are in recovery know this. In some ways, we are the lucky ones. “Normal people”, if such people even exist, may fool themselves into thinking they are free. Recovering addicts know better. We know that, without a Higher Power, we continue to be slaves. Not every recovering addict knows that this Higher Power is manifested in Jesus, but there are many who do believe this. I am one of them. And when I am living the Jesus-way, I do indeed find that I am free from self and free to be my self.

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“Reveling in the Love”

On February 14, 2023 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

My 12-step affirmation for today is as follows:

“Today, with God’s help, I am reveling in the love of God and others and helping others to revel in my love for them. Let the reveling begin and never end!”

Happy Valentine’s Day! Are you reveling in the love today, or are you saying, “Wake me up when this is over”? Or worse, perhaps you don’t believe in love at all. A guy that I liked a lot back in my undergrad days was skeptical about everything: god, people, meaning. That was why I liked him.

“You don’t believe in love,” I said to him one day. To my surprise, he shot back with, “Of course I do!” When he had savored my shocked expression for a few seconds, he continued, “We couldn’t have tennis without it!” I’m not much of a tennis player, but even I know that love means nothing in tennis. To some of us, love means nothing. Yes, period, full stop, and a Forrest Gump, “That’s all I’ve got to say about that.” Some of us would have difficulty in reveling in something that we don’t even believe exists.

And we need to face it: There seems to be plenty of evidence for hate in our world today. Where on earth is the evidence of love?

Well, that’s a good question. For once, I have a good answer. Love in sleeping a few feet away from me. In a little, she will get up and fix breakfast. She will have already run a brush through her lovely grey hair. She doesn’t really need to do that; I like it when it goes every-which-a-way. But she wants to be presentable as she fries our eggs. She loves me for no particular reason. That’s good because there isn’t a reason.

Last night, my wife and I won a trivia contest. We were playing “The Happy Couples” quiz game at the RV resort where we are staying. One of the questions that I got right was, “What will your wife say is her best personality trait.” I was initially stumped. There are so many. I started to type “Helpfulness” into the phone, but then I thought, no, and typed in “Forgiveness”. She knew that’s what I would say. She knew right.

But my wife’s forgiving love is based on something: her awareness that God has loved her and forgiven her. I revel in her love because she revels in the love of God.

There is the story that is the New Testament about a cat named “Jesus of Nazareth”. He lived, taught, and died for the love of God and the love of us. He also loved us so much that he was raised from the dead. Apparently, it is true what they say: Real love never dies. Or, rather, real love does die, but not forever. It will rise from the dead, more surely than the sun is rising as I write this post. Real Love will also give us life and the ability to forgive.

Again, I say, happy Valentine’s Day!

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“Pride in its Proper Place”

On February 13, 2023 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

I did a 12-step reading the other day that made me think a bit differently about the “vice” (??) of pride.

Pride works from within; it is the direct appreciation of oneself.
  Arthur Schopenhauer

Pride, like all emotions, has two faces: one healthy and one sick. It is our challenge to use the healthy side well. Sick pride fills us with ourselves, looks down on others, and has no room for generosity. Healthy pride is heavy with humility. If we can feel joyful when we succeed, and tell others about it honestly, we are not being boastful.

Sick pride often keeps us from doing things because we are too proud to ask for help when we need it, or too proud to risk failure, or too proud to do anything that might not turn out perfect.

Healthy pride about our greatest victories always comes with the awareness that we did not do it all by ourselves. We had the aid, advice, and encouragement of loved ones. In all things that really count, we never walk alone. Even those who claim pride is not a virtue admit that it is the parent of many virtues.

What makes me proud of myself today?

From Today’s Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.

Of course, even healthy pride is prone to getting sick. It can pick up the common cold with uncommon ease. And, with Pride, the common cold can develop into cancer in a matter of seconds.

Christian thinkers, from Augustine of Hippo to C.S. Lewis, have pointed out that evil is not the opposite of good. Rather, evil is the twisting of something that is good. The Bible has verses that suggest the same.

For example, the Apostle Paul (whom I suspect was a person who struggled with pride) said that there was a good kind of boasting—boasting in the LORD (1 Corinthians 1:31) Boasting is usually a sign of sick pride. Healthy pride is focused outward and upward toward God.

This same Paul pointed out that, if we play our cards right, the very God in whom we boast will commend us. “Therefore do not pronounce judgment before the time, before the Lord comes, who will bring to light the things now hidden in darkness and will disclose the purposes of the heart. Then each one will receive his commendation from God.” (1 Corinthians 4:5, English Standard Version) In other words, God wants to be proud of us!

So, when we actually do something right, it is okay to acknowledge that. However, if we go on and on about it, rest assured that we have crossed over into a pride that does not serve anyone well, least of all, ourselves.

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“We Are All One of Us”

On January 7, 2023 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

I heard someone say the other day that a certain politician only thought in terms of blaming “them”. I do not think that this politician is alone. Indeed, he has tapped into a deep vein of human stupidity.

Thinking in terms of us and them categories is as ancient as the human race. In fact, it may not even be peculiar to homo sapiens. Wolves are not kind to other wolves who are not in their pack.

However, the fact that something is ancient or widespread doesn’t make it either inevitable or right. Perhaps we should all think about how to move beyond our us versus them thinking. But how could we do that? I don’t know, but I have some suspicions. And where knowledge is lacking, suspicion must do.

Maybe the first thing I can do is to ask a simple question: What am I getting out of my us-and-them categories. This simple question has at least two simple answers, neither of which I like.

One of the things that I get out of us versus them thinking is an easy sense of belonging. What I mean by this is that, if there is an outside group, there is also an inside group. And if we are not part of the outsiders, we must be insiders. We belong!

There is nothing wrong with wanting to belong. We are each unique beings, but we long to be part of something bigger than ourselves. It is the word “easy” in the phrase “an easy sense of belonging” that is the problem. Anything that is too easy is almost certainly not a healthy thing. Like the second piece of apple pie, easy belonging is only easy in the short term.

Something else that us-them thinking does for me is that it gives me someone besides myself to blame. Having someone else to blame is great fun because it exempts me from the profoundly uncomfortable process of acknowledging my own problems and doing something about them. If the problem is “out there”, I can complain about my chosen “them” rather than change myself. In other words, us and them is a form of laziness—or, at least, it is an excuse for laziness.

After I’ve done the difficult task of wrestling with the question of what I get out of my us-and-them-ism, I can get down to the really serious question. Which is what? I suppose that this question has many forms, but I would phrase it this way: Is there really any such thing as us and them?

The answer is, at one and the same time, an emphatic “Yes!” and an equally emphatic “No!”

Yes, we are all unique individuals, and we are part of unique configurations. Whether that configuration is a family, a race, a religion, a socio-economic class, or something else, us-and-them categories are real. To deny this flies in the face of the facts.

Yet the answer is also “No!” Here is the truth: We are all born. We all some basic needs: air to breathe, water, food, shelter, companionship, a sense of purpose and significance. We all eventually die. To say that we have nothing in common is to reveal that we are not simply blind, but also fools.

So, whenever we are tempted to fall into the us-versus-them trap, we had better get back to the basics: breathing, eating, and such. After all, we are all one of us.

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“When Somebody Else’s Golf Cart Ends up in the Ditch”

On January 3, 2023 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

Somebody’s golf cart ended up in the ditch a while back. Several people commented on Facebook that, “he shouldn’t have had that much to drink.” Turns out that the guy had a seizure. Respect means, among other things, putting the best possible construction on other people’s words and actions.

I am not naïve. I have lived long enough to realize that some people really do stupid and/or harmful things. People also have bad (or at least, mixed) motives. That’s all true. But I have also lived long enough to learn that my evaluations of other people are frequently wildly wrong.

Even if we are right about a person’s motivation, we are not right to think the worst of them. Such thinking, even when it is technically correct, is wrong. Why? Two reasons: It makes them less likely to change for the better at the same time that it makes us less kind and compassionate. The last time I checked, kindness and compassion were important character traits.

Jim, our preacher this past Sunday, said “It is more important to be kind than to be right.”

And then, there is this. Eventually, we all end up with our golf cart (or our hearts) in the ditch. And none of us want other people to think the worst of us, even if they’re right.

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“No ‘Oh-You-Agains’ in God”

On January 2, 2023 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

Have you ever gone to someone for help and had them give you an “Oh, you again?!”? Eye rolls are optional, but often present. This person has helped you before, but figures you ought to know what to do for yourself by now.

And maybe we should know by now, but we don’t. Or perhaps we simply can’t do certain things on our own, even if we know how. We need help.

Some of us grew up with parents who were oh-you-again-ers. We began to feel stupid and incompetent almost before we could walk. It is difficult living with folks who are reluctant to help. Eventually, we quit asking.

Worse yet, we are in danger of becoming our parents. Perhaps we become good at something and forget all the not-so-good steps along the way. Novices come to us for help, but we have become eye-rolling oh-you-again-ers.

And worst of all, we begin to think that God is part of the oh-you-again-er tribe. We mess up and refuse to come to God with our mess-ups because we are afraid. Like Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden, we hide from God. Yet only God can forgive us and restore us.

Jesus said, “Fear not, little flock, for it is your Father’s good pleasure to give you the kingdom” (Luke 12:32, English Standard Version). James says, “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him” (James 1:5). I suspect that, if James were asked if God would reproach us for asking for other good things, James would look at us incredulously and exclaim, “What!” In fact, James, later in the same letter, tells his readers that they don’t have what they really need, simply because they don’t ask or because they ask with wrong motives (James 4:1-10). If we ask for the wrong things or ask with evil motives, God is under no obligation to give those things to us, In fact, it would be cruel of God to give us those things when we are asking in that way.

But the bottom line is this: God is pleased when we ask for God’s help. God knows that we are weak, foolish, erratic people who need a boatload of help. I was reading some wisdom from an American Indian website (White Bison) this morning and was helped by the following statement:

“if we practice this for awhile, our thought life will be different. It helps if in the morning we ask God to direct our thinking. God loves to help us.
Great Spirit, today, direct my thinking so my choices are chosen by You.”

We have a God who loves to help us. There are no oh-you-agains in God. Now that is good news indeed!

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“The Word of the Year: Respect”

On January 1, 2023 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

As many of you know, I have for several years been taking a word or short phrase as my mantra for the year. This year’s word is “respect”.

Actually, I checked to see how many times in the past I had written about respect in one way or another on this website. My search turned up 36 times that I had used the word “respect” as one of my tags. Apparently, respect is important to me. I suspect that I am not alone in this respect.

Respect has a lot of different aspects. Here is a short list:

  • Respect for God.
  • Respect for other people.
  • Respect for myself.
  • Respect for time—my own time and that of others.
  • Respect for all sentient beings.
  • Respect for immaterial things, including the planet.

We sometimes speak of “simple respect”. Perhaps respect is fairly simple to understand. Consistently speaking and acting in a respectful manner is not so simple, however. But, as with many things, respect is a muscle. It can atrophy, but it can also be toned up with use. I plan to work on this muscle in the year 2023.

So, expect some more posts (not all, thankfully) about respect in the year 2023. The post for tomorrow will deal with one of the words that the Hebrew Bible/Old Testament uses for honor or respect. For now, I leave you with the following quote from Antoine de Saint-Exupery:

“I have no right, by anything I do or say, to demean a human being in his own eyes. What matters is not what I think of him; it is what he thinks of himself. To undermine a man’s self-respect is a sin.”

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“Too Early to Summarize My Life”

On December 18, 2022 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

“In fact, I do not even judge myself. 4 For I am not aware of anything against myself, but I am not thereby acquitted. It is the Lord who judges me. 5 Therefore do not pronounce judgment before the time, before the Lord comes, who will bring to light the things now hidden in darkness and will disclose the purposes of the heart. Then each one will receive his commendation from God.” (1 Corinthians 4:3b-5, English Standard Version)

I am older than I’ve ever been up to this point. Most of my life is behind me. That isn’t pessimism. That is a stone-cold sober fact. Sometimes I try to summarize my life. I have been given so many good things. But what have I done with these wonderful things? Not much, I’m afraid. When I try to sum up my life, the sum doesn’t seem to add up to much.

However, I wonder if there aren’t a couple of things wrong with my summarization of me. First, if there really is a final judgment for all of us, as I believe there is, my timing is off. The time will come when I will be judged. Even if I were to die tomorrow, today isn’t the day for my summarizing of myself.

Second—and even more importantly—I am not the person to summarize my life. That is way above my pay grade. The great Apostle Paul said that he didn’t judge anyone, not even himself. He said that it wasn’t time to judge, and that he wasn’t the one to judge. God was.

And then he said one of the most astonishing things that self-critical people like me could ever hear. Paul says that when we are judged by God, we will receive . . . condemnation? No. Punishment? No.

Instead, Paul says that we will receive . . . praise! This Greek word can also be translated with our word “commendation”, as the English Standard Version does translate the word.

Sometimes, we think of Heaven as a place or state of being where we praise God. And so I believe it is. But Heaven is also a place where God praises us. That is astonishingly good news.

I’ve known people who seemed to find the good in everyone and everything. Perhaps God is like that too, only on steroids.

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“Walking Humbly with a Humble God”

On December 14, 2022 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

“Praise the LORD!

             Praise, O servants of the LORD,

                        praise the name of the LORD!

Psa. 113:2 ¶    Blessed be the name of the LORD

                        from this time forth and forevermore!

Psa. 113:3       From the rising of the sun to its setting,

                        the name of the LORD is to be praised!

Psa. 113:4 ¶    The LORD is high above all nations,

                        and his glory above the heavens!

Psa. 113:5       Who is like the LORD our God,

                        who is seated on high,

Psa. 113:6       who looks far down

                        on the heavens and the earth?

Psa. 113:7       He raises the poor from the dust

                        and lifts the needy from the ash heap,

Psa. 113:8       to make them sit with princes,

                        with the princes of his people.

Psa. 113:9       He gives the barren woman a home,

                        making her the joyous mother of children.

             Praise the LORD!” (Psalm 113, English Standard Version)

“He has told you, O man, what is good;

            and what does the LORD require of you

            but to do justice, and to love kindness,

            and to walk humbly with your God?” (Micah 6:8, English Standard Version)

It isn’t easy being humble and walking humbly with God. Perhaps it would be a bit easier if we recognized the humility of God himself. The God who requires us to walk humbly with Him is the God who humbles himself to walk with us. In the ancient Near East, the gods did not generally walk with human beings. Humans sometimes encountered these gods. Sometimes the gods spoke to humans. But these encounters and messages were not usually good news for the human who experienced them. The best thing to do with the gods of the ancient world was to sacrifice to them and not tick them off. The gods of the ancient Near East were definitely not known for their humility.

We sometimes fail to realize how radical the God of Israel was and is. This God is loving. This God is forgiving. This is a God who does not require humankind to serve and feed him. This is a God who provides food and serves humans. This is a God who humbles himself to look at what is in heaven and on earth.

In Psalm 113:4-5, we are told how highly exalted God is. Then, in verse 6, we are told that God humbles himself to look on what is in heaven and on earth. But God’s humbling of himself does not stop with merely looking. God lifts the poor, seating them with royalty, and God takes care of those who can’t have babies. God’s humility requires that God get his hands dirty in human affairs.

What a strange and wonderful God!

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“Following: An Initial Spasm and a Long Lethargy?”

On December 12, 2022 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

“Again Jesus spoke to them, saying, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” (John 8:12, English Standard Version)

Someone has said something to the effect that, for too many of us, faith is an initial spasm followed by a long lethargy.

The verse that leads off this post is the YouVersion verse of the day for December 3, 2022. It is a beautiful verse on its own, but it became even more lustrous when I looked at it in the original Greek. The verb for “following” is in the present tense. As noted many times in my posts, the Greek present tense usually suggests ongoing, repetitive action.

So, following Jesus is a fulltime job. Spasms won’t cut it!

Here is my problem: “Sporadic” is my middle name. Perhaps “spasmatic” might be an even better descriptor. Now I don’t want to be too hard on myself. I’ve prepared for and run a couple of marathons. I have an advance degree in Bible/theology. These things take consistent time and preparation. I am capable of being consistent. Also, like every other virtue, consistency can easily morph into rigidity. Rigidity is not a virtue.

However, when I hear Jesus’ call to continually follow him, I must confess three things. First, I feel honored and exhilarated. Second, I feel dismayed at the prospect of the dailiness of this following. Third, I feel hopeless about pulling this off at all. So, I move from honored and exhilarated to dismayed and hopeless in a hurry.

The thing that sustains me—when I allow it to do so—is the fact that Jesus notices when I fall behind or fall away. Sometimes he waits for me to catch up. More often, Jesus comes to me where I am, and walks beside me. It is important for me to realize that the Jesus I strive to consistently follow is the same One who walks with me.

When I was a little guy growing up on the farm, my mom would walk up the path to the barn. I tried to keep up, but often I had to cry out in a plaintive, little-boy voice, “Momma, wait for me!” I don’t recall her ever chiding me for not keeping up. She would come back to me, shorten her stride, and walk beside me. Maybe Jesus is at least as understanding as my mom.

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