Monthly Archives: March 2018

“THE CONTENT OF CHARACTER: CHOICES, THOUGHTS, AND DEEDS”

“The content of your character is your choice.  Day by day, what you choose, what you think and what you do is who you become.” (Heraclitus)

I was just about to play some computer word games.  The problem is that I am trying to eliminate them for a while.  If I could play ten minutes and stop, that might be okay.  However, I tend to play ten minutes, and then keep playing.

So, instead, I read some quotes from one of my favorite philosophers: Heraclitus.  When I read the above quote, I was so glad that I had chosen not to play any computer games, because I don’t really want to become a computer game.

What do I want to become?  I want to become love, humility, kindness, and courage.  I want to become more like Jesus Christ.

But here is the important question: Am I in fact making the moment-by-moment decisions about my choices, thoughts and deeds that will help me to become more loving, humble, kind, courageous, and Christ-like?

Wanting is not enough.  Choices, thoughts and deeds matter.

In one of my 12-step readings this morning, the author (anonymous as you might expect) pointed out that there are two basic requirements for sobriety: trusting God and doing something for your recovery.

It isn’t a case of either/or.  It is a matter of both/and.  And I’ve noticed that the more I really trust God, the more I am freed up to do what I need to do to be sober.  And the more I do what I need to do to be sober, the more I trust God.

You’ve heard of vicious cycles?  Trusting God and doing what I deeply need to do is a virtuous cycle.

“MOTIVATIONS, DO WE REALLY KNOW WHY WE DO THINGS?”

People may be pure in their own eyes, but the LORD examines their motives.” (Proverbs 16:2, New Living Translation)

I suspect that the second half of this verse tends to negate the first half.  No, I am not saying that this proverb contradicts itself.  What I am saying is that I think that the Lord’s examination of our/my motives tends to call into question our purity.  Note also the words “in their own eyes.”  This is a phrase that often raises serious questions about the accuracy of our perception.

Do we really know why we do things?  I doubt it.  I have doubted it for a long time.

When I was a pastor, I noticed that the reasons people gave me for leaving the church I was serving almost never coincided with the reasons they gave to other people.

Now, of course it is possible that people were simply too cowardly (or too polite?) to give me their real reasons.  However, it may well be that they didn’t really know their reasons, or that their reasons were changing as they went along.

Of course, my own motivations for moving from one church to another were always pure—or not!  (Years ago, I read or heard someone say, “Why is it that a pastor never feels ‘the leading of the Holy Spirit’ to go to a church that pays less than the church he’s serving now?”  That’s not always true, but it’s a good question, nonetheless.)

I was thinking about this matter of motives when a TED talk landed in my e mail in box.  A Swedish researcher was talking about motivation.  I need to listen to it again, but his final conclusions were pretty straightforward.  Since his final words confirmed what I already suspected (both from Scripture and experience), I thought his words were very insightful.

“Know that you don’t know yourself!

(Or at least not as well as you think you do.)”

So, if we can’t be too sure about our motivations and the choices that we think flow from them, what are we to do?

First of all, we can be more humble about our own self-lack-of-knowledge.  Knowing that I don’t know myself may not be a very satisfying type of knowledge, but it may be a very healthy kind of knowledge.

Second, we can cut other people some slack about their own motivation.  If I don’t even know much about my own motivation, what right do I have to think I know someone else’s motivation?

Humility about ourselves often leads to kindness toward others.

“KEEPING THINGS FRESH”

A friend proposed a wonderful topic the other day in my 12-step meeting: how to keep recovery fresh.  As with anything else, those of us who are in recovery from addiction can (and sometimes do) get stale.

Of course, this question is a good one for all kinds of activities and relationships, not just 12-step recovery programs.  All kinds of things can get stale: from bread to jobs, marriages, friendships, hobbies, churches—you name it.

While it was a good question that my friend proposed, I’m not so sure that I have equally good answers.  However, the wonderful thing about a good question is that it gets into your mind and rattles around in it and shakes things up.  A good question is itself a refreshing thing.

So, while I don’t necessarily have any earth-shattering insights, perhaps some random thoughts might be in order.  You can add your own.  The purpose of blogs is not to simply be read, but to provoke your own thoughts.

First, here is a thought from Heraclitus the Obscure, one of my favorite philosophers.  Heraclitus said, “No one ever steps into the same river twice.  The river has changed and so has the person who steps into it.”  There is a sense in which change and freshness are woven into the very fabric of the universe.  Perhaps freshness isn’t so much created as it is acknowledged.

But second, there are things we can do to keep our lives fresh.  And these things can also help us to refresh other people as well.

A friend of mine is taking art classes.  Somebody asked him why he was doing that.  “Are you particularly interesting in painting?” he was asked.  “No,” he replied, “I just thought it might be interesting.”

Trying new things isn’t easy, but it is refreshing.  There are some types of food that I don’t care for.  I can still order and eat them.  There are certain kinds of music that I don’t like very much.  (Hip-hop comes to mind!)  I can listen to it anyway.

I have a tremendous craving for routine.  That is not necessarily a bad thing, but it can easily become a rut.  When a routine becomes a “rut-ine,” my routine has become a problem.  Someone has said that the only difference between a rut and a grave is depth.  Yes!

One last thought: Hang around with people who can stretch you.  My wife is so good at keeping me from getting into or staying in a rut.  She likes to try new recipes, to order different things at restaurants—or even to try new restaurants.  She is a wild one!  (If it were up to me, we would always go to the same restaurants, I’m afraid.)

Cultivating new friendships as well as taking fresh approaches to old friendships is a wonderful way of stretching yourself.  As I get older, I value more or more old friendships and making new ones.

My 12-step friend’s question was itself refreshing.  Perhaps asking and savoring some new questions, as well as taking fresh approaches to old questions, is one of the best things we can do to maintain a green, growing edge in our lives.

“DISCONNECTING THE PANIC BUTTON”

Fear not!”  (Gen. 15:1.  See also Gen. 21:17; 26:24; 35:17; 43:23; 46:3; 50:19; Exod. 20:20; Deut. 1:21; 20:3; 31:6,8; Jos. 8:1; 10:25; Jdg. 4:18; 6:10,23; Ruth 3:11; 1 Sam. 4:20; 12:20; 22:23; 23:17; 2 Sam. 9:7; 13:28; 1 Ki. 17:13; 2 Ki. 6:16; 17:34; 25:24; 1 Chr. 28:20; 2 Chr. 20:17; Ps. 55:19; 64:4; Isa. 7:4; 35:4; 41:13f; 43:1,5; 44:2; 54:4; Jer. 40:9; 46:27; Lam. 3:57; Dan. 10:12,19; Joel 2:21; Zech. 8:13; Mal. 3:5; Matt. 1:20; 10:28; 28:5; Lk. 1:13,30; 2:10; 5:10; 8:50; 12:7,32; 18:4; Jn. 12:15; Acts 27:24; 1 Pet. 2:18; Rev. 1:17.)

I have a panic button, and I push it often.

For example, I will say to my wife, “Oh, dear!  I’ve forgotten/lost/forgotten to do __________!”

And then, after I’ve gotten myself and my wife all riled up, I remember that I have not forgotten/lost/forgotten to do __________ after all.

My wife has gotten into the habit of not paying attention to my panic button.  If I ever have a real emergency, I may be in real trouble.

So, why exactly do I hit the panic button so often?  I can answer that with great confidence: I have no idea.

However, I might have a few suspicions.

First of all, I suspect that I hit the panic button because I have attention deficit disorder, and it often really does contribute to my losing and/or forgetting things.  So, I figure that the safest thing is just to assume I have lost or forgotten something.  However, there is an old bit of wisdom that I regularly ignore that goes like this: “Never bet against yourself.  You’ll lose for sure!”  Perhaps I should pay more attention to that old saying.

Second, I think that, if I hit the panic button, maybe someone will come to my aid.  Here, I probably need to remember a child’s story with a very grown-up message: The Boy Who Cried Wolf.  He cried “Wolf!” as a joke one too many times.  When a wolf really did attack, no one believed him.  (In one version of this old fable from Aesop, the wolf eats the shepherd boy, but I spare you any more gory details.)  My wife has made a radical, simple, and practical suggestion: “Why don’t you check first before you get me all stirred up?!”

A third suspicion is that part of my problem is the matter of time management.  If I am trying to pack too much living into life, I have a tendency to either really forget things, or at least think that I have.  If I managed my time more wisely, perhaps I would be less prone to hit the red button.

But whatever the reason (or excuse??) for hitting the panic button, I’ve come to one conclusion: It is never ever helpful to hit the panic button.  It just makes me and everyone around me feel more panicky, and less able to deal with any real problems.

In one of my favorite movies, “Apollo 13,” Flight Direction Gene Kranz, says, “Let’s work the problem, people.  Let’s not make things worse by guessing.”

So, how do I disconnect the wires of the panic button?  I don’t know, but I’m going to figure it out.  Perhaps taking a few deep breaths might help.  Breathing is a good idea at any time, and breathing deeply is the best kind of breathing.  Holding my breath or panting is usually a prelude to hitting the panic button.

Perhaps praying the Serenity Prayer might help.  Then, there is the “5-Day Spiritual Adventure” prayer that I learned many years ago: “Calm my spirit, LORD!”  Combining slow breathing with one or both of these prayers could be an excellent mixed drink to calm my jangly nerves.

Dear readers, if you are prone to hit the panic button, and if you have anything that you’ve tried that works for you, don’t hesitate to e mail me with your suggestions.   You may be helping me not only to write better blogs in the future, but you may also help to lengthen my wife’s life.

 

“PURITY: THE QUESTION OF GOD’S WORD”

“9 How can a young person stay pure? By obeying your word.

10 I have tried hard to find you– don’t let me wander from your commands.

11 I have hidden your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you.” (Psalm 119:9-11,     New Living Translation)

 

My wife was reading these verses aloud this morning during our devotional time, and she read the second half of verse 9 as a question: “By obeying your word?”  She immediately corrected herself.  “Oh,” she said, “that’s not a question; that’s the answer.”

Actually, it is possible to read the entire verse as a question.  So, her “mistake” may not have been a mistake at all!

However, I suspect that her correction of her reading is correct after all.  While it is possible that all of verse 9 is a question, I think it more likely that in the second half of the verse, the psalmist is answering his own question.

In any case, my wife’s creative reading of Psalm 119:9 invited me to think more deeply about the verses that follow it.  I was also invited to think not only about the verses that follow, but more importantly about how to follow these verses.

Interestingly, after asking the question in verse 9—and possibly answering it—the psalmist seems to have immediately sensed a problem: the problem of wandering.  Most of us don’t “go into a premeditated backslide,” as a friend of mine once expressed it.  Most of us just wander.  We get a little further and a little further away from God’s will for our lives, but eventually, we look up and wonder how on earth we go so far away from God.  We need not wonder: We wandered!

Verse 11 gives us to antidote to wandering: hiding (or treasuring) God’s Word in our heart.  The Hebrew word translated “hidden” is a word that often suggests hiding something (or someone) that is very special to us, so that it cannot be harmed.

C.H. Spurgeon, a preacher from the late 19th century, gave an interesting outline for vs. 11:

  1. The Best Thing (God’s Word)
  2. In the Best Place (our hearts)
  3. For the Best Purpose (so that we may not sin against God).

It is important to remember that we do not hide God’s Word in our hearts in order to impress others with how much we know.  We hide God’s Word in our hearts so that we won’t mess up our own and other people’s lives, and so displease God.  The question is not whether we read or know God’s Word.  The question is whether we are using it to live our lives in accordance with God’s will for us.

“The Philosophy of Water”

Today’s blog post is simply a connection with an excellent TED talk at https://www.ted.com/talks/raymond_tang_be_humble_and_other_lessons_from_the_philosophy_of_water.  The speaker says a lot in about ten minutes.

He is not necessarily coming from a Christian perspective.  He is speaking of the power of water and lessons he has learned from water, from the standpoint of the ancient Chinese philosophy embodied in the book, Tao Te Ching.

However, if you remember that Jesus claimed to be intimately connected with the water of life (John 7:37-39; 6:35), it is not difficult to understand Lao Tzu’s philosophy in a Christian manner.  (Of course, we in the Midwest are experiencing the destructive power of water, but Tang’s talk is still a good one.)

Enjoy!

“THE FIRST DAY OF MY LIFE”

Here is a brief meditation based on my report to my 12-step sponsor on Wednesday, February 28, 2018

“Dear ­­_____,

No violations.

AFFIRMATION: Today, by God’s grace, I am treating this day as if it is the first day of my life.  I am treating today this way because it is the first day of my life.

Here is my sponsor’s reply..

“See this day through the eyes of a child. Enjoy the first day of the rest of your life.”

“See this day through the eyes of a child.”  Yes!

So, I am listening to Richard Stoltzman’s composition “Begin Sweet World” on You Tube right now.  It is achingly beautiful.  And so, my day begins!

A wonderfully hopeful section in a very sorrowful, pessimistic book of the Bible says it very well indeed.

“ 20 I will never forget this awful time, as I grieve over my loss.

21 Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this:

22 The faithful love of the LORD never ends! His mercies never cease.

23 Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning.

24 I say to myself, “The LORD is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in him!”

25 The LORD is good to those who depend on him, to those who search for him.

26 So it is good to wait quietly for salvation from the LORD.

27 And it is good for people to submit at an early age to the yoke of his discipline:” (Lamentations 3:20-27, New Living Translation)

I can begin afresh each morning because God has brewed up a fresh batch of mercies for the day.

A cup of fresh mercies, anyone?

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