Monthly Archives: August 2018

“ON (MAYBE) HAVING A DISEASE I DIDN’T USED TO BELIEVE WAS REAL”

On August 21, 2018 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

I used to believe that fibromyalgia was not a real thing.  It was easy to be a disbeliever, since I didn’t have it.  However, over the years, I’ve come to accept that it is a real thing.

It became really easy today, because I am aching all over.  I went to the doctor.  My vital signs were all great, which is . . . great!  However, the doctor was really puzzled by my symptoms.  I was actually somewhat pleased when she said, “I have no idea what’s going with you.”  I never trust anyone who never says, “I don’t know.”

However, I do trust my wife!  She lives with my pretty much all the time, and she is a nurse.  Furthermore, I have had things in the past that she diagnosed long before the doctors and medical procedures verified them.  So, when she said, “You know, this sounds kind of like fibromyalgia,” I was listening.  Pain that nearly doubles you over sometimes helps you to hear better.

So, we each did a bit of research, and sure enough, the vague (but intense) symptoms seemed to fit.  In addition, some things that I read about possible contributing factors sounded like some things I have been going through—anxiety, lack of sleep, and so on.  Some things that help ease the pain also sounded like some things I had been intuitively doing.

I was especially struck by the anxiety piece.  The truth is that I most certainly have some anxiety right now.  I am about to teach a class I’ve never taught before, in a program that I’ve never taught in before, using Accordance Bible software, which I downloaded less than a week ago.  And, from the time I was asked to teach the class, until the first class was just over two weeks.

Yes, I would say that anxiety could be an issue!

However, it occurred to me that there was something I hadn’t done.  I hadn’t prayed.

Now, I believe in God (most of the time).  And I also believe that God answers prayer.  Whether it is the answer we want is a completely separate matter.

But God has been so good to me, has given me so many wonderful things, that I hesitate to ask for one more.  Why, in Heaven’s Name, shouldn’t I hurt?!  After all, I’ve had a good life.

As soon as I verbalized this thought to my wife, I heard how stupid it sounded.  God is not constrained!  God can bless and bless and bless again.  Why shouldn’t I pray for healing?

So, I did.  And I took a nap.  When I got up, I felt much better.  I could stand straight, not looking like a human question mark.

And another thing: For the past, I don’t know, two months (?), whenever I am inclined to entertain regrets, I send Jesus to the door.  For some reason, regrets seem to be scared of him.  They do not come in.  Instead, they run away.

So, I thought to myself, anxieties are actually just regrets that I have imported from the future.  Why not send Jesus to the door whenever anxieties knock?

If I deal creatively with anxieties (or rather, let Jesus deal with them), the pain may go away.  At the very least, sending Jesus to the door may help substantially.

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“ ‘THAT’S TENNESSEE, SON’: THE BEAUTY OF THE NOT-SO-ORDINARY”

On August 20, 2018 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

“in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” (1 Thessalonians 5:18, New American Standard Bible, 1995)

A gentleman I met at church told me a wonderful story yesterday.  Seems he was a pastor, and served in San Diego.  He said, “San Diego is beautiful, but it is a desert.  If you see green, you know that it’s a park, and you’re going to have to pay at least $5.00 to get in.”

Then, he was called to a little church in eastern Tennessee.  As his plane was flying into the postage-stamp of an airport, he was absolutely struck with wonder at all the greenness.  He assumed that it must all be man-made parks.

He turned to his seatmate, a man who was from Tennessee, and asked, “What is that down there?”

At first, the man didn’t understand the question.  When he finally did understand, he said, “That’s Tennessee, Son.”

Now, I have been to both San Diego and eastern Tennessee.  They are both drop-dead gorgeous.  But this story sent me down another path.  What if virtually every place is gorgeous?  What if ever place is a garden of wonder?  What if it isn’t greenery, but gratitude, that makes a place, a relationship, a life-situation, lovely?

There are times when I’m mowing the grass in my own back yard when I feel such gratitude for even having a yard.  This, despite the fact that a lawn-care professional who was bidding on a contract to take care of it wrote that we had “a nice crop of weeds.”  Sometimes, even weeds can be lovely—at least to me.

When I was little, my dad complained about my praying before we ate.  “That boy thanks God for the birds, and grass, and weeds, while my food gets cold!”  That little boy is still alive in me somewhere.

And then, there are my relationships.  I have so many friends.  I have a wife who loves me, and whom I love.  I have activities that I love to do—blogging for example.  My life is full and deeply satisfying.

So, from this particular angle on this particular day at this particular moment, I look down and say, “This is my life.  And, oh, is it ever beautiful!”

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“DON’T SAY CONSPIRACY!”

On August 20, 2018 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

The other day, as I was getting ready to leave after a workout at Planet Fitness, I had a very disturbing conversation with a guy who was about my age.  He was really into conspiracy theories, and apparently President Trump was going to deal with them all.

Now, I am most definitely not a fan of Donald Trump, but I can understand why many people are.  I grew up in the country.  I get why people don’t like being called “Appalachians,” or “hillbillies,” or “fly-over country.”  I don’t like being called “the rust belt,” or even “the Bible belt.”  Trump tapped into an aquifer of anger for decades of mistrust of our government, and the desire to be taken seriously.  I get that.

But all these conspiracy theories really worry me.  Do we really believe that our military could have bombed North Korea and Iran into submission, without the word leaking out?  That was the talk of the gentleman in the locker room.

However, on further review, it occurred to me that we all (yes, me too) are prone to believe in conspiracies.  I suspect that there are at least two reasons for this.

One reason is that there really are government conspiracies that are unmasked at times.  Therefore, it is easy to believe that our government might be engaging in other conspiracies.

But there is a second reason: Conspiracy thinking caters to our innate human tendency to want to pass the buck, to pretend that we are not part of the problem.

Isaiah lived at a time when there really were a lot of political conspiracies.  Foreign powers were meddling in Judean politics, and some within Judah were siding with various foreign powers.

And yet, here is what the prophet is told,

Is. 8:11   For thus the LORD spoke to me with mighty power and instructed me not to walk in the way of this people, saying,

12          “You are not to say, ‘It is a conspiracy!’

In regard to all that this people call a conspiracy,

And you are not to fear what they fear or be in dread of it.

13          “It is the LORD of hosts whom you should regard as holy.

And He shall be your fear,

And He shall be your dread.

14          “Then He shall become a sanctuary;

But to both the houses of Israel, a stone to strike and a rock to stumble over,

And a snare and a trap for the inhabitants of Jerusalem.

15          “Many will stumble over them,

Then they will fall and be broken;

They will even be snared and caught.”

Notice that believers are not to get caught up in conspiracy theories, or even in conspiracy realities.  Rather, they are to fear the LORD, even dread the LORD, and regard the LORD as holy.

But then, right after Isaiah is told to fear the LORD, he is told that the LORD is a sanctuary.

Too much concern and talk about conspiracies is not appropriate for believers.  This applies whether those believers think that President Trump (or anyone else) is the best thing that ever happened to America, or the worst thing.  Our focus needs to be on God, who is both the one to be feared and trusted.  Only then can we honestly say that God is also the one who is our sanctuary.

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“SOME REMINDERS TO MYSELF”

On August 19, 2018 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

Sometimes, I need to remind myself of what is real.  Here is something I wrote in my journal some time ago.

“Reminders to myself:

Thou shalt not look over the edge, lest thou fall over the edge.

Thou shalt do what thou shouldst, and not what thou wantest.

Thou shalt be grateful for what thou hast.

Thou shalt not be desirous of what thou hast not.

Thou shalt remember that thou hast been created by God the Father, bought with the blood of Jesus, and sealed by the Holy Spirit.

Thou shalt not commit lightly, but shall keep all your commitments.

Thou shalt think of the long-term consequences of thy thoughts, words, and actions, and not just immediate pleasures.

Thou shalt consider that thou hast already created enough pain for thyself and others.”

Of course, I could add a great many more of these.  Here are three, which may actually contain all the others:

Thou shalt remember that you are not God, that God is God, and that this is very good indeed!

“EMOTIONAL HOARDERS”

On August 17, 2018 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

Are you a hoarder?  I am, though I don’t often admit it.  Of course, I need to hold on to plastic Wal-Mart bags!  After all, I sometimes take the dog for a walk, and she has to . . .  Well, you get the picture.

Of course, there is a difference between hoarding and collecting.  Or is there?  Perhaps collectors are just organized hoarders.  I remember once visiting “House on the Rock” near Spring Green, Wisconsin.  It’s a very strange place.  It was built (yes, on a rock) to be a retreat.  However, the original owner and subsequent owners have filled the huge house with collections of all kinds.  I left there with sensory overload and a splitting headache, and said to my wife, “Whoa!  What did we just see?”

We, as a society, are hoarders.  Think of the explosive growth of the storage unit business.  The first self-storage units were built in the 1960’s.  Now, there are enough of them to cover as much space as three Manhattan Islands!

But there is more than one variety of hoarder.  There are emotional hoarders.  There are people who hoard all kinds of feelings, but especially negative feelings.  They can tell you about people who hurt their feelings when they were eight years old, even though they are now sixty-seven years old.  (Hey, come to think of it I am sixty-seven and can remember people who hurt my feelings when I was eight.  Hummmm.)

Of course, we all have memories—some good, some bad.  But that is not what I am talking about.  I’m talking about hoarding the feelings attached to those memories.  Their minds are so full of bad feelings attached to bad memories, that they have to rent emotional storage units by the time they are twenty-one.

I’ve known a few people who did not fall into this trap of hoarding emotions.  They had found a way to feel whatever they feel, and then let those feelings go.

How did they do that?  I don’t know.  I’m not sure that even they know.  But I think that people who are not emotional hoarders may do three things.

First, they actually feel what they feel.  They don’t try to mask or deny their feelings.  They don’t necessarily express their feelings to the one who has upset or angered them, but they do acknowledge their feelings to themselves.

Second, they think about what happened.  They try to recognize that they may have actually been at least partly in the wrong.  In any case, they try to learn something from their negative feelings, even when they are not at all in the wrong.

Third, they let the feelings go.  They seem to have made a decision that it is harder to hoard all those feelings than it is to drop them.

I have often been an emotional hoarder, but I’m getting better.  I am discovering that letting go of emotions is both possible and enjoyable.  I used to tell myself that I couldn’t let go of those emotions, but eventually, I began to realize that I was lying to myself.  The problem was not that I couldn’t.  The problem was that I wouldn’t.  Increasingly, I can let go of those feelings, because I choose to do so.

Now, if I could just stop hoarding Wal-Mart bags!

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“ON BEING ASKED TO TEACH SOME CLASSES AND BEING IN OVER MY HEAD”

On August 16, 2018 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

Have you ever felt—at the same time—great joy and great fear?  If so, you will understand the following e mail that I just sent to my twelve-step sponsor.  It consists of a report (“No violations,” in this case) and my affirmation for the day (in bold print).

“Dear Bob,

No violations.

Today, by God’s grace and with God’s help, I am consistency in doing triage and doing what I can do, rather than the perfect stuff that I wish I could do.

The affirmation requires a bit of unpacking, I think.

This past Friday, I got an e mail from the dean at Cincinnati Christian, asking me if I would be interested in teaching some classes.  They involved helping students (master level and perhaps also undergrad) to understand a bit about Hebrew and Greek by means of software.  Of course, I was tremendously thrilled with this, and said of course.

I met with the dean yesterday, and while I am still thrilled, there are some problems, none of which are unsolvable.  However, in the interest of getting current (as well as in the interest of unpacking the affirmation), I will list them.  Then, I will solve them as best I can, one at a time.

  1.  The undergrad course begins on August 27 of this year!
  2.  I am using Accordance software applications, rather than BibleWorks.  I am fairly used to BibleWorks, but not Accordance.  However, I have downloaded Accordance onto my computer already, and am beginning the learn it.
  3.  There is a very rough draft a syllabus, but I’m going have to develop my own in a hurry.
  4. I have not read the only book that is required for the course.
  5. I’m scared.

This is the sort of class that I have dreamed about teaching.  I can do this, and do it well.  However, I need to be consistency—not just consistent, but consistency!

However, consistency is not perfection, and I need to do a good job of triage on what I can do in the length of time I have to do it, with my current understanding of the Bible and technology, and with the students I have.

Perhaps the fifth thing that I listed above is the most important: I’m scared.  I plan to let fear drive me in a good direction and at an appropriate pace, but only God is capable of leading me to be a really good instructor.  That is because God Himself is the most “teacherly” of teachers.”

(You might also want to read another post I wrote, “DTEB, “IN OVER MY HEAD”.  It would appear that I feel overwhelmed quite a bit of the time!)

 

 

 

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“UNITE MY SCATTERED HEART!”

On August 15, 2018 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

Wednesday, August 15, 2018

I only slept about six hours last night, and woke up several times.  Oh well!  I’m glad for the sleep that I did get.  I am not a fortune teller, but I do think I see one or more naps in my future.

On the other hand, I also see a lot of work that needs doing.  I need to get the house back together after the carpets were cleaned yesterday, so that my wife won’t come home to a mess.  I also need to write a blog, go to CCU to meet with Jamie Smith about teaching one or more classes, prepare for and teach Hebrew class, and exercise.  It is going to be an interesting day!

Meanwhile, after awaking a little after 3:00 a.m., I was starting to put things back, now that the floors are fairly dry.  However, in the midst of that, I was convicted by Psalm 86:11: “Unite my heart to fear thy name.”  I’m afraid that my heart/mind is very divided today.

So, I go downstairs to have my devotions.  First things first!  God!

However, my laptop won’t work right this morning.  I can’t access Bible Works, which I usually use for my devotions.  I want to look at Matthew Henry’s comments on Psalm 86:11, but my smart phone is outsmarting me.  I can get to Henry’s commentary on Psalm 86, but not his thoughts on verse 11.  Finally, I decide to have a look at a devotional book that my wife and I sometimes use.  In today’s devotional thought, the author talks about how we humans have messed up the world.  I feel fairly messed up myself!

God, I’ve got more work than You have given me to do!  Root out those things in my life that are competing with the work that You have given me to do.  And help me to not plant more weeds.

Unite my heart to fear thy name!

(Post Script: I lost part of this journal entry/blog because I left the Word program before saving my work.  Sometimes, the best thing you can do is to laugh at yourself.  Dear reader, I hope that you have a gathered and godly day!)

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DTEB, “A TRICK IS NOT A TRICK WHEN YOU’VE SEEN IT BEFORE”

On August 14, 2018 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

“When you forgive this man, I forgive him, too. And when I forgive whatever needs to be forgiven, I do so with Christ’s authority for your benefit, so that Satan will not outsmart us. For we are familiar with his evil schemes.” (2 Corinthians 2:10-11, New Living Translation)

“So the LORD God asked the woman, ‘What is this you have done?’ And the woman said, ‘It was the serpent. He deceived me, and I ate.’” (Genesis 3:13, Complete Jewish Bible)

A friend in my 12-step group made a wonderful comment this morning.  We were discussing how to get back on track after a relapse.  My young friend who is crazy way too wise for his years said something like the following: “Once, I said that the devil had tricked me, and I had acted out.  But then, I realized that he had done that same thing before.  It occurred to me that, if I know the trick, then it isn’t really a trick anymore!”

Right.

Too often, like Eve, I say, “The serpent deceived me . . . .”  However, Eve said, in the same breath, “. . . and I ate.”  She admitted her own decision and action pretty quickly.  I get around to admitting my personal responsibility—eventually.  But unlike Eve, I am not so prompt about acknowledging that personal responsibility.

We addicts, before we have admitted that we are addicts,  tend to say, “Well, I have my problems, but I’m an exception.”  When we finally admit how out-of-control we are, we no longer regard ourselves as exceptions to the rules.

However, whenever we want to relapse, all that the addiction (or the devil, or our own worse self?) needs to say is, “Oh, this time will be an exception.  It will be different this time!”

And too often, we fall for this trick—even when we know it’s a trick.  Someone has defined insanity as “doing the same stupid thing again, and expecting a different result.”  Addiction is a form of insanity.

So, I’m not going to talk anymore about the devil or the addiction or my worse self tricking me.  Instead, I’m going to say, “I see where this is going, and I choose not to go there!”

There is an old proverb that is often attributed to the Chinese.  But whoever came up with it, thank you very much!  Here it is:

“Fool me once, shame on you.

Fool me twice, shame on me.”

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“HANDS FREE TO WELCOME GOD’S BLESSINGS”

On August 14, 2018 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

I sometimes do a prayer thing called, “Palms down, palms up.”  It is simple, perhaps even simplistic, but I find it helpful.

When I turn my palms down, I am dropping into the hands of Almighty Love all my concerns about the past, worries about the future, and concerns of the day.

Then, when I turn my palms up, I picture myself receiving all the blessings of the day.  Sometimes I say something to the effect, “God, I welcome all the blessings you have for me today.”  I said that this morning.

And as soon as I said it, a bluebird landed on the garden fence post right outside my study window.  And I am not exaggerating!  It was right after I prayed this!  And immediately after that, a goldfinch swooped through and landed on another garden fence post!

So, the first three items on my gratitude list today were:

  1. A lovely morning.
  2.  A bluebird I saw, right after praying to God, and saying, “Help me to accept gratefully whatever you give me today.”
  3.  The goldfinch I saw right after I saw the bluebird.

Of course, a skeptic would say, “How do you know those birds wouldn’t have landed on those fence posts anyway?!”  And of course, the skeptic would be right.

But one thing is for sure: I don’t think I would have noticed the birds if I had not prayed.

And one final thought.  It is only after I’ve dropped a lot of stuff that I am in a position to receive God’s gifts.  I need my hands free to welcome God’s blessings.

What do you need to drop in order to see and enjoy God’s blessings?  Remember that it is first “palms down,” before it can really be “palms up”!

 

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“ON NOT CARING WHAT OTHERS THINK OF ME”

On August 12, 2018 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

“What other people think of me is really none of my business.”  Thus spoke one of my 12-step friends.  He had been told he was ugly, not once but twice, this morning.

He isn’t ugly.  In fact, I told him that he looked like love to me.

But back to his saying that “what other people think of me is really none of my business”—I think that my friend is mostly right, but perhaps, a little wrong.

He is right because other people don’t know enough about our inner workings to evaluate us.  They can, perhaps, evaluate specific, external performance, but our innards, not so much.  Really, not at all!   He is also right because we can’t control what others think of us.  It is literally “none of our business.”

So, what is wrong with my friend’s saying?  Two things, I think.

First, if we think of ourselves as completely insulated from what others think of us, we also may miss out on their encouraging words and thoughts.  And we all need encouraging words at times.  Some encouraging words we remember from long ago.

Over thirty years ago, in a men’s accountability/prayer group, I was bemoaning the fact that I have a high tenor voice.  One of the guys in the group, Danny, said, “Well, your voice just sounds like love to me.”  The fact that I still remember his words all these years later demonstrates the power and longevity of an encouraging word.

But second, there is an equally important reason why we should care about what others think of us and say to us.  If we do not pay attention to what others think and say about us, we may miss certain unpleasant, but necessary, truths about ourselves.  People often convey to me that I talk too much.  They usually do this through teasing.  That may not be the best approach.  Perhaps it would be better to be direct, and simply say, “Sometimes, you talk too much.”  But whether it is said directly or indirectly, I need to listen.  I can’t see my own blind spots.  If I could, they would be called “seen spots,” wouldn’t they?  How can I grow, if I don’t pay attention to what others think of me?

So, there are two things I need to care about concerning what others think of me: encouragement about what is right with me, and accountability in areas where I need to grow.  Beyond those two things, what others think of me really isn’t any of my business.

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