“God’s Nevertheless of Love”
At some point, we all have to say either “therefore” or “nevertheless.” “Therefore” is usually the easiest conclusion. Sometimes it is the best one, but not always.
A person treats us badly. We can say, “Therefore, I am treating them badly.” Or we simply write them out of the script of our lives.
On the other hand, we could acknowledge the bad treatment, but choose to say, “Nevertheless, I’m not so sure that they are usually that way. Maybe they’re just having a bad day.”
Now, I believe that there is a time for drawing some logical, protective conclusions for ourselves and those we love. I am not a fan of staying in long-term abusive relationships. Unless there is a good chance of change and a process for change—a process that the other person is working on a daily basis—a firm “therefore” might involve leaving a relationship, getting a restraining order, or any number of other “therefores”. Love does not involve being a stubborn idiot.
However, I am increasingly aware that we jump to the logical therefore way too quickly. People can and do change. In fact, I will hazard the statement that people can’t stay the same. Of course, not everyone changes for the better. We all know people who don’t just get older. They also get more-so. That more-so is not always a good more-so, either.
In the Old Testament of the Bible, we are told and shown two things repeatedly. The first is that God remained lovingly faithful to Israel. The second is that Israel rarely responded to God’s loving faithfulness with love and faith and loving obedience. Sometimes, God did say, “Therefore, I have given you into the hands of your enemies.” At the very least, God gave them over to the consequences of their own thoughts, words, and actions. Israel, at this point, is a metaphor for all peoples of all times and each of us individually.
More often, God says, “Nevertheless . . .” to Israel. He did not give up on them. God doesn’t give up on us either.
Turning to the New Testament, God bares his heart to the human race through Jesus Christ. Jesus is God’s decisive Nevertheless.
“Exalted, But Not Aloof”
“Psa. 113:4 The LORD is high above all nations,
and his glory above the heavens!
5 Who is like the LORD our God,
who is seated on high,
6 who looks far down
on the heavens and the earth?
7 He raises the poor from the dust
and lifts the needy from the ash heap,
8 to make them sit with princes,
with the princes of his people.
9 He gives the barren woman a home,
making her the joyous mother of children.
Praise the LORD!” (Psalm 113, English Standard Version)
We have a way-beyond-the-starry-heavens God, who is also incredibly down to earth. Not just down to earth, but down in the dust and the ashes with us.
I found Derek Kidner’s words even more energizing than the coffee I drank this morning. I quote him at length.
“‘Far down …’
The challenge of verse 5, Who is like the Lord our God?, meets us, expressed or implied, throughout the Bible. It is put eloquently and at length in Isaiah 40:12-41:4, but it has its witnesses everywhere, even in the names of men and angels (Micaiah, ‘who is like Yahweh?’; Michael, ‘who is like God?’). Here this transcendence is memorably [Vol 16: Psa, p. 437] suggested by the perspective of verse 6, where the very heavens are almost out of sight below him. He is, as JB [The Jerusalem Bible] puts it, ‘enthroned so high, he needs to stoop to see the sky and earth!’23
7ff. Yet he is anything but aloof. Verses 7 and 8 anticipate the great downward and upward sweep of the gospel, which was to go even deeper and higher than the dust and the throne of princes: from the grave to the throne of God (Eph. 2:5f.).
Consciously, however, these verses look back to the song of Hannah, which they quote almost exactly (cf. 7, 8a with 1 Sam. 2:8). Hence the sudden reference to the childless woman who becomes a mother (9), for this was Hannah’s theme. With such a background the psalm not only makes its immediate point, that the Most High cares for the most humiliated, but brings to mind the train of events that can follow from such an intervention. Hannah’s joy became all Israel’s; Sarah’s became the world’s. And the song of Hannah was to be outshone one day by the Magnificat. The spectacular events of our verses 7 and 8 are not greater than this domestic one; the most important of them have sprung from just such an origin.
But it would distort the psalm, and its values, to make verse 9 simply a means to an end. The psalm finishes with what seems an anticlimax, and it must not be disguised. It is here that God’s glory most sharply differs from man’s: a glory that is equally at home ‘above the heavens’ (4) and at the side of one forlorn person.
There is plainly much more than rhetoric in the question of verse 5, ‘Who is like the Lord our God?’”
Nina Totenberg, long-time NPR reporter, tells a wonderful story about her father. Roman Totenberg was a world-renowned violinist and teacher, who lived to be 101 years old. He was teaching students—quite literally—on his death bed. Nina Totenberg tells the story of her father being asked by Franklin Roosevelt to perform at the White house.
Her dad “. . . had a few weeks earlier played for the king of Italy, and that affair was so formal that he had to borrow a top hat and cape from the Polish ambassador, and back off the stage so as not to offend the king. In contrast, after the performance at the White House, Eleanor Roosevelt served dinner in the family quarters, serving each of the performers from a sitting position on the floor in front of a table. As Totenberg would later recount, he thought to himself as he compared the two events, ‘This is the country for me!’” (https://www.npr.org/2012/05/08/152275442/roman-totenbergs-remarkable-life-and-death, accessed 11-07-2022)
A God so transcendent, yet so near to those who sit in the ashes—this is the God for me! And for you, too, I believe.
“The Blue Hour”
“Rom. 13:11 ¶ Besides this you know the time, that the hour has come for you to wake from sleep. For salvation is nearer to us now than when we first believed.
Rom. 13:12 The night is far gone; the day is at hand. So then let us cast off the works of darkness and put on the armor of light.
Rom. 13:13 Let us walk properly as in the daytime, not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and sensuality, not in quarreling and jealousy.
Rom. 13:14 But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to gratify its desires.” (Romans 13:11-14, English Standard Version)
I woke up well before the dawn this morning, as I generally do. It is unseasonably warm and nice here in Cincinnati, so I decided to walk and run (well, jog) early. With the time change, I wasn’t sure if I had time for that before a Zoom meeting with some friends and church. So, I did what we all do these days: I searched online.
Sometimes, online searches give you more than you had bargained for, and once in a while, that “more” is really good. So it was in this case. I learned more than what time the sun came up. I learned what the twenty or thirty minutes before sunrise and after sunset are called: “the blue hour.” You probably already knew that, but I did not. Apparently, it is called “the blue hour” because, on a clear day, the sky is dark blue at those times.
One of the things that I do is to see connections where others do not. Probably, some of my “connections” are pretty disjointed or even manufactured. However, I like them, and will continue to see (or make) such connections. My mind went to Romans 13:11-14. Paul is writing to Christ-followers in Rome and says that they need to wake up. What! How can you be following Christ and yet be asleep?
That is the question, isn’t it? But God knows that some of us try. Or perhaps sleep walking is our default position? Paul mentions several ways of being asleep: carousing and drunkenness, sexual immorality, dissension, and jealousy. And just in case, these specific varieties of somnambulism don’t hit the believers with a bucket of cold water, Paul adds “thinking about how to gratify fleshly desires.” Who of us doesn’t want what we want when we want it?
Time to wake up, dear friend. It is the blue hour!
“Keeping Things Fresh”
We talked about keeping recovery fresh today in our Zoom 12-step group. That is an important topic. Routines and rituals can be very healthy. However, they can also become another “r” word: ruts. And, as someone has said, “The only difference between a rut and a grave is depth.”
It’s not just recovery from addiction that needs to be kept fresh. Everything needs refreshing on a regular basis. Marriage, the spiritual life, work, exercise regimens, study, diet—all need to be kept fresh.
But how?
I suppose that step one is to recognize that I am responsible for staying fresh. If something in my life has become stagnant, it is not someone else’s fault. Stagnant is something I do to myself. So is fresh.
Several helpful comments were made during the meeting. One person said that he uses gratitude for things, people, and experiences to keep his recovery fresh. He also said that, when someone mentioned something that they did to improve their recovery, he would often try that out. Some things worked and some did not, but some of the things he had stolen for others had made a huge and healthy difference in his life. As I listened to the discussion and reflected on it afterward, I said to myself, “Keeping recovery fresh is an individual responsibility, but it is a together kind of task.”
And in that same vein, another person said that serving other people was the main way in which he kept his recovery fresh. If I’m feeling stale, serving others is like a fresh (and refreshing) breeze blowing through my life.
So, what am I going to do today, right now, to refresh my recovery, my marriage, my spiritual life? Well, writing this blog post was one thing. Perhaps reading this post and passing it along to someone else might be part of your own refreshment.
“The Importance of Looking Good”
“But the LORD said to Samuel, ‘Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart.’” (1 Samuel 16:7, English Standard Version)
“3 Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— 4 but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. 5 For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, 6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.” (1 Peter 3:3-6, English Standard Version. These verses are from a passage where the author of 1 Peter gives advice to wives and husbands.)
I’ve never been very concerned about looking good. I’ve just realized that I’ve been mistaken about that, or at least very one-sided.
My wife and I went out and worked in the front flower bed yesterday. If it were up to me, I would let winter have its way with the flower beds. What can I tell you? At times, I can be incredibly lazy.
I think that Sharon’s concern with this particular flower bed is at least partially because it is the front flower bed. She is concerned about other people seeing (even in the winter) a scraggly mess of last season’s beauty.
Now, don’t get me wrong. My wife is not a vain person. As with every living human, there might be a trace of that in her, but only a trace. Vain? No! In fact, this morning it hit me like a mighty wave of revelation that she is just plain right. Other people get to—or have to—see our flower bed. We owe it to them, as well as to ourselves, to give them something to look at that is not ugly and disorderly. Yes, even in the winter.
This same principle applies to houses and personal appearance. Looking good isn’t everything, but it is also not nothing. The Bible leans heavily upon inner beauty, and so should we. However, the same Bible that warns us against an overemphasis on outward beauty also has an entire book of love poetry in which the lovers carry on the whole time about how beautiful and handsome their loved one is. The book is called “The Psalm of Psalms”, which is the Hebrew way of saying “the very best of psalms”.
“Inflection Points and the Curvature of the Soul”
I got an email the other day that used a phrase that I have often heard, but I didn’t really understand what it meant: “inflection point”. I had a very general idea of what it was, but I had never really drilled down into its precise meaning. When I drilled, I hit two very different (though related) veins of meaning.
Here is a little something I picked up from Professor Google:
“in·flec·tion point
noun
- 1.
MATHEMATICS
a point of a curve at which a change in the direction of curvature occurs.
- 2.
US
(in business) a time of significant change in a situation; a turning point.” (https://www.google.com/search?q=inflection+point&rlz=1C1GCEA_enUS844US844&oq=in&aqs=chrome.0.69i59l2j69i57j69i59j69i60l4.3629j0j7&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8, accessed 11-03-2022)
Now, I don’t understand mathematics, geometry, and calculus even a little bit, but this is an intriguing thought. The point at which a curve changes its direction—hummmm.
Most of us live fairly curvy lives. We mean to walk the straight and narrow, but life throws us curves. Perhaps we need to consider which way the curves are going, and which way we need to go. We do have choices, and we need to make good ones.
In a sense, every moment of every day we have to decide which way we need to be curving. This is not only true when we are in crisis. It is true all the time. All the time, we are deciding which way to move.
St. Augustine of Hippo says in one of his works that sin is the soul curving back on itself. When every decision asks only “What is in this for me?” the inflection point becomes a point along a terrifying constriction of the soul. And as long as we/I continue to turn the same direction, we get smaller and smaller. To put it less philosophically, as that famous non-philosopher Anonymous has said, “A person wrapped up in him or herself makes a very small package.”
I have a good friend who, whenever I call him in my distress, says, “How can I be of service?” Now that is a question that helps me. I have a hunch that he himself is also helped to curve in a better direction by asking the question and acting on my response.
“Instant Gratification and Speed Chess”
As I think I have confessed in these musings before, I am very prone to immediate gratification. In fact, I’m into keeping on with the not-so-gratifying gratification until it is no longer gratifying at all. Online chess is—like the internet itself—highly addictive. Ten-minute games are my current drug of choice.
Now, don’t get me wrong. There is nothing wrong with chess. Well, there isn’t anything wrong for many folks. It can be fun and can expand your mind. However, I can turn everything into an addiction.
One of the problems with the desire gratification, via chess or anything else, is that it ignores reality: both material and spiritual realities. You doubt? For the material aspect, try this on for size.
“Prepare your work outside;
get everything ready for yourself in the field,
and after that build your house.” (Proverbs 14:27, English Standard Version)
I grew up on a farm. My dad kept talking about building a new and better house. He never got out of the field long enough to do that, so we lived in a—how can I say this delicately—a house that was more than a little old. (Of course, in many parts of the world, our house would have been a mansion.) My dad wasn’t terribly religious, but he was living in tune with Proverbs 14:27 for sure!
And perhaps, he was wiser than I gave him credit for. We always had what we needed. He had seen farmers who, after a couple of good harvests with decent prices, started building nice, modern houses. Some of them never got to live in their new houses because they had to stop building them, due to a lack of enough money to finish them. In some cases, the bank owned the house and the farm after next year’s crop failure.
But for Christ-followers, the issue is even more pressing. For Christians, we need to take avoiding the lust for immediate gratification very seriously. This includes the very spiritual and practical realms. Jesus said that the most important thing we could do was to love God with all we are, and our neighbor as we love ourselves. The problem with my desire for immediate gratification is that it all about me. I’m not thinking about loving God or loving my neighbor; I’m thinking about me.
So, making a list of things I need to do to “get my fields ready” and things I need to do in order to love God and others is very important. After doing those things, if I have a little time to play games of chess might be just fine. (Well, maybe just one or two.) Otherwise, perhaps it is chess that needs to be crossed off my list—permanently.
DTEB, “Don’t Hold Your Breath!”
Today’s post begins with the lyrics from a wonderful song by Jonny Diaz.
“Alarm clock screaming bare feet hit the floor
It’s off to the races everybody out the door
I’m feeling like I’m falling behind, it’s a crazy life
Ninety miles an hour going fast as I can
Trying to push a little harder trying to get the upper hand
So much to do in so little time, it’s a crazy life
It’s ready, set, go it’s another wild day
When the stress is on the rise in my heart I feel you say just
Breathe, just breathe
Come and rest at my feet
And be, just be
Chaos calls but all you really need
Is to just breathe
Third cup of joe just to get me through the day
Want to make the most of time but I feel it slip away
I wonder if there’s something more to this crazy life
I’m busy, busy, busy, and it’s no surprise to see
That I only have time for me, me, me
There’s gotta be something more to this crazy life
I’m hanging on tight to another wild day
When it starts to fall apart in my heart I hear you say just
Breathe, just breathe
Come and rest at my feet
And be, just be
Chaos calls but all you really need
Is to take it in, fill your lungs
The peace of God that overcomes
Just breathe (just breathe)
let your weary spirit rest
Lay down what’s good and find what’s best
Just breathe (just breathe)
Just breathe, just breathe
Come and rest at my feet
And be, just be
Chaos calls but all you really need
Is to just breathe
Just breathe”
(https://www.google.com/search?q=lyrics+Just+Breathe!+Christian+song&rlz=1C1GCEA_enUS844US844&oq=lyrics+Just+Breathe!+Christian+song&aqs=chrome..69i57j0i22i30j0i390.14281j0j7&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8, accessed 11-01-2022)
I had an interesting exchange of emails this morning with a guy that I am sponsoring in my 12-step group.
“Dear N.,
I was especially struck by this sentence: “I drive myself crazy trying to get the things I think I want, forgetting that if I just let go, I’ll probably get better than I can imagine.” Yes!
Your words about love also touched me deeply. You are absolutely right about the love always being there. You are also right, I think, about the fact that we can only experience that love when we let go and are doing what we can to receive and participate in that love.
In terms of the letting go part, the thought occurred to me that, in fact, we do this all the time. It is called breathing. We let go of one breath in order to take another. Many religions, philosophies, and non-descript approaches to life emphasize breathing. I am struck that, in my own tradition, Christianity, breath is mentioned at the very beginning of the second creation story in Genesis 2:7. This original breath was breathed into us by God. Perhaps every breath is breathed into us by God. None are guaranteed. All are freely given. I think I’m a bit more aware of this because of having blood clots on my lungs on a couple of occasions.
In fact, the same Hebrew word (ruah) can mean “spirit, wind, or breath”. It is sometimes hard to decide which translation is the best in a particular text of the Bible. The same word in Greek (pneuma) is also used in similar ways in the Greek New Testament.
So, in a sense, with every breath, I am breathing in God’s breath. Maybe what we are really beathing in is love, but we don’t have the sense to know it. And, unfortunately, I am forever trying to hang on to my last breath when God has a fresh one for me.
“Be the Change, Even When You Can’t See the Change”
Here is my response to my sponsee, concerning things changing:
“Dear __________,
I was struck by the following sentence which set me thinking: “Still feeling ready for things to be different, still feeling willing to do whatever it takes for that to happen, and enjoying having a nice day as opposed to the miserable days I’ve had recently.”
“. . . ready for things to be different . . . .” Yes! I suspect that we all are. But, as you suggest, that is somewhat in our own hands. I think that it is not so much that things need to be different (in a good way) as it is that we need to be different.
But here is the problem, at least, as I see it: We become different—in a good or in a bad way—little by little, day by day. It is such a gradual process that we can hardly notice that it is even occurring.
George MacDonald, a writer from the late nineteenth century, spoke of “being a doer of the work.” I think that the immediate context went something like this: “He who would be a hero will barely be a man, but he who is a doer of the work, he will be blessed in his work.”
You, sir, are indeed a doer of the work. And remember what we say at the end of each meeting: “It works if you work it and give a lot of love.”
You can be the change, but you will probably never see the change.”
None of likes process, but life is primarily process. So, most of us don’t like our lives very much.
I hear someone asking, “But don’t you believe in miracles?” And the answer is, yes, I do. However, I also believe in process. Often, the process is the prelude to the miracle. Much of the time, the process is the miracle. And even when wonderful miracles unfold slowly, in a process manner, they are still miracles. Amazing things, even if they are so gradual as to be imperceptible to us, are still amazing things.
“Pleasing God: Sharing What You Have”
“15 Through him [i.e., Jesus] then let us continually offer up a sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of lips that acknowledge his name. 16 Do not neglect to do good and to share what you have, for such sacrifices are pleasing to God.” (Hebrews 13:15-16, English Standard Version)
In yesterday’s post (), I wrote about the sacrifice of praise (vs. 15). Today, I am going to take a quick look at vs. 16 and sharing what you have.
Almost all of us have something that we could share with others. Money? Well yes, that of course. And we do have some money. Like everybody else, I like to complain about inflation. I do this along with my fellow-complainers while we are in line at restaurants.
Oops! I guess that indicates that I am contributing to inflation myself. It also indicates that I can probably share some of my wealth.
But helping others financially, as important as it is, is just one expression of the larger matter of doing good. Doing good is mentioned first. It has become a term of contempt to call someone “a do-gooder”. I wonder if that doesn’t say something quite disturbing about our society. Since when did doing good become a bad thing to do?
There are probably thousands of ways to do good. I remember a lady that I didn’t know at all gave me a smile one time when I had a raging headache. It was a tremendous act of kindness to be, though she never knew.
A kind word, a nice home-cooked meal, a small bouquet of flowers, a card that doesn’t even have to be an expensive Hallmark card—these and many more can be forms of doing good. One of the ladies at our church, Betty, prays for everybody and their dog—literally! John, another guy at our church, is always ready to greet someone at the door or to offer an umbrella on a rainy day. When the executive minister of our church found out that my wife and I had covid, she was immediately asking what she could do to help. In addition to being our executive minister, she is a wife and a mom of several little ones. Her kind offer was help enough. I have friends who do good by having listening ears and non-judgmental spirits.
The list goes on, but I will not. Each of us needs to make our own lists.
John Wesley, the father of Methodism, said it this way:
“Do all the good you can,
By all the means you can,
In all the ways you can,
In all the places you can,
At all the times you can,
To all the people you can,
As long as ever you can.”
Sounds like a pretty good plan to me.
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