“You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden.” (Matthew 5:14, English Standard Version)
“Today, as God helps me, I am a living reflection of my Heavenly Father.” (My twelve-step affirmation this morning)
But I don’t feel much like the light of the world or a living reflection of God this morning. There are reasons.
But I refuse to do anything to make a difficult day worse. I refuse to think harmful thoughts toward myself or anyone else. I refuse to eat a bunch of junk food. That would make me feel a little better for a little while, but it would also cause me to feel a lot worse in a little while.
Instead, I do positive things, no matter how I feel.
I will reflect God’s love and grace no matter how I feel on this or any other day.
Many of us have a hard time facing our weaknesses and failures. I do too. Some of us have an even harder time facing our strengths. Here is a blog that may help you to face up to your strengths. It most certainly helped me!
This post is a very slightly edited e mail exchange that helped to kick-start my day. G. is a friend from my 12-step group, and is one of the most interesting, sharp, and encouraging people I know.
I have edited the exchange in order to respect the anonymity of both G. and me. I am the “D.” in the exchange. His e mail to me comes first. My reply to G. follows.
“Dear D.
I spent half of this last year faking it, hoping to make it. I prayed, I surrendered to God, I listened for God. It took that time just to start hearing something from Him. Eventually I realized He was talking to me all along. I just didn’t see how.
One of the ways I figured it out was watching and listening to you. You understand God as well as any person I know. Your ability to tell us things that God is saying is amazing.
Now you say that you are not good at talking with God. That doesn’t exactly make a novice like me see any hope. You just don’t see it.
I watch you talk about your wife, and I see God speaking in both of you. I watch that because watching you as you think about her tells me all I need to know. I listen and watch you talk about bible verses and I see a man who is connecting to God and the prophets.
So once again you are reducing the positive effects of you thoughts by diminishing yourself. As Bob Newhart said: “STOP IT”. Look it up if you don’t know.
You are a better man than that. The only problem is, I don’t know if you’ll ever see how much God loves you until you let Him tell you and you believe it. We may be a bunch of addicts, but everyone in SLAA (except for a couple) Knows you’re a good person, a smart person, a loving person, in touch with God, and a great friend.
So right now, stand up, look to heaven, and say to God: You made me a good person, I know I’m a good person, and I’m going to show myself I am and listen to You whenever You tell me something.) Then relax and clear your mind. That warm fuzzy feeling is God talking to you. Even I know that.
If you show this to your wife (that’s fine), now is when she can kick your butt for me. You said to call you out. I hope you weren’t kidding.
Your Friend
G.
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1 Samuel 30:6 David was now in great danger because all his men were very bitter about losing their sons and daughters, and they began to talk of stoning him. But David found strength in the LORD his God. (New Living Translation)
I wasn’t feeling particularly strong this morning physically, emotionally, or spiritually. So, I thought of 1 Samuel 30:6.
A literal translation of that last sentence would be “And David strengthened himself in the LORD his God.” It was something he did to himself. (For Hebrew students, the verb translated “strengthened” of “found strength” is a hithpa`el.)
We are told in 1 Samuel some of the things that had taken place up to this point. David had been on the run from King Saul for years. He had finally taken refuge with the Philistines, but they did not altogether trust him. He had offered to go to war on the side of his Philistine host. We are not told whether the offer was sincere or not. As is often the case, David’s motives are opaque.
David was sent back to the town he and his marauders had been given by the Philistines, Ziklag. However, as they drew near, all they saw was a pile of burned rubble. The Amalekites had raided Ziklag, and taken all the possessions and family members of David and his men. David’s men seem to have been very loyal to him generally, but loyalty has its limits. They were so devastated that “they began to talk of stoning” David.
But then, we are told that “David strengthened himself in the LORD his God.” We are not told how he did that, just that he did it.
How do you strengthen yourself in the LORD? I don’t really know, but I do have some suspicions. Here is what works for me.
How did God answer Paul’s prayer? “Each time he said, ‘My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.’ So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.”
Weakness, when acknowledged and submitted to God, is the strongest form of strength.
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