“I probably won’t recognize you,” she said, looking me squarely in the eyes.
I returned her steady gaze and said, “But I will recognize you.”
Rewind the story by about forty-five minutes.
I was sitting outside a small coffee shop near my home. I had taken a book along to read, just in case my friend was late. He was more than late; he forgot completely. But it was a nice day, cool with a gentle rain. The coffee was good and the Danish pastry was delicious. I was content.
It was Lynne’s book that I noticed as she walked toward the door of the coffee shop. “Watcha reading?” I asked.
“Still Alice,” she replied. “It’s about dying and Alzheimer’s,” she said, staring at me with a steady gaze. “A fun read,” she added.
“Regular beach reading,” I commented.
“Yes,” she said.
While she was getting her coffee inside, I decided to hazard a serious and personal question. The lady and I appeared to be about the same age. I am genuinely interested in the stories that are people. Also, at my age, I don’t have time for chit-chat. Serious questions are the order of the day.
So, when she came out, I asked the lady my ultra-serious question. “So, are you dying, or do you have Alzheimer’s or both?”
She stopped and looked at me to see if I was being cruel or just trying to be funny. She saw that the question was a serious and compassionate one. “Both,” she said.
Her name was Lynne, and she had been dealing with her diagnoses for several years. The forgetting was getting worse. She had given up her volunteer work because she was afraid that she might harm someone. She was still driving, but only locally where she was familiar with the streets.
She had been a librarian. Now, she had to read the same page over several times. If she did that, she might remember something.
We sat and talked for a good while. Her life sounded as if it was worth several books. When we left, I said, “I’ll probably see you here again.”
“I probably won’t recognize you,” she said, looking me squarely in the eyes.
I returned her steady gaze and said, “But I will recognize you.”
In a letter to a church which the Apostle Paul had founded (and which was, in Paul’s opinion, drifting into serious error), Paul reminds them of their past when they were ignorant of God (Galatians 4:9). Paul also reminds them that they now do know God. At least, they know God in some measure.
However, right after saying that the Galatians now know God, Paul corrects himself. “Now that you know God, or rather, are known by God . . . .” (emphasis mine)
Knowing God is important. However, according to Paul, the thing that really matters is that God knows us.
Whether we have Alzheimer’s or are simply forgetful, it is a wonderful thing that God looks us in the eyes and in the heart and says, “But I will recognize you.”
I want to know God, but I don’t really. At least, I don’t know God very well.
I suppose that this is only to be expected. After all, God is infinite and I have lots of limits. God is holy, I am not. God is all-knowing. I don’t know much about much, and it is quite likely that much of what I know for sure is just plain wrong. The list goes on and on, but I won’t.
In Galatians 4:9, the Apostle Paul says that the believers know God, but then immediately adds that it would be better to say that they are known by God.
Alan Cole, in the Tyndale Commentary on the book of Galatians, comments on 4:9,
In the Bible to know has a far deeper meaning than the superficial concept of intellectual knowledge alone. That is why it can be used of the relation of God and humanity, and also of the peculiarly intimate relation of husband and wife. But it is typical of Paul’s strong theological position that he is reluctant to speak of humans ‘knowing’ God; at once, he corrects it to the passive to be known by God. This transfers salvation altogether out of the possibly subjective and possibly illusory into the great objective reality of the will of God.
We all long to be completely known. We are also deathly afraid of it. If anyone knew us completely, knew all our fears, selfishnesses, lusts, and hang-ups, would they love us? Love us?!? Would they even be able to stay in the same room with us, or would they run for the exit?
But the same Bible that tells us that God knows us completely also tells us that God loves us totally. How on earth can that be!
I don’t know, but I do believe it to be true.
What I am trying to say here has been much better said and sung by Tauren Wells. Here are the lyrics to a wonderful song that he wrote titled “Known”:
“It’s so unusual it’s frightening
You see right through the mess inside me
And you call me out to pull me in
You tell me I can start again
And I don’t need to keep on hiding
I’m fully known and loved by You
You won’t let go no matter what I do
And it’s not one or the other
It’s hard truth and ridiculous grace
To be known fully known and loved by You
I’m fully known and loved by You
It’s so like You to keep pursuing
It’s so like me to go astray
But You guard my heart with Your truth
A kind of love that’s bullet proof
And I surrender to Your kindness
I’m fully known and loved by You
You won’t let go no matter what I do
And it’s not one or the other
It’s hard truth and ridiculous grace
To be known fully known and loved by You
I’m fully known and loved by You
How real, how wide
How rich, how high is Your heart
I cannot find the reasons why
You give me so much
How real, how wide
How rich, how high is Your heart
I cannot find the reasons why
You give me so much
I’m fully known and loved by You
You won’t let go no matter what I do
And it’s not one or the other
It’s hard truth and ridiculous grace
To be known fully known and loved by You
I’m fully known and loved by You
It’s so unusual it’s frightening
I’m fully known and loved by You”
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