“When you forgive this man, I forgive him, too. And when I forgive whatever needs to be forgiven, I do so with Christ’s authority for your benefit, so that Satan will not outsmart us. For we are familiar with his evil schemes.” (2 Corinthians 2:10-11, New Living Translation)
“So the LORD God asked the woman, ‘What is this you have done?’ And the woman said, ‘It was the serpent. He deceived me, and I ate.’” (Genesis 3:13, Complete Jewish Bible)
A friend in my 12-step group made a wonderful comment this morning. We were discussing how to get back on track after a relapse. My young friend who is crazy way too wise for his years said something like the following: “Once, I said that the devil had tricked me, and I had acted out. But then, I realized that he had done that same thing before. It occurred to me that, if I know the trick, then it isn’t really a trick anymore!”
Right.
Too often, like Eve, I say, “The serpent deceived me . . . .” However, Eve said, in the same breath, “. . . and I ate.” She admitted her own decision and action pretty quickly. I get around to admitting my personal responsibility—eventually. But unlike Eve, I am not so prompt about acknowledging that personal responsibility.
We addicts, before we have admitted that we are addicts, tend to say, “Well, I have my problems, but I’m an exception.” When we finally admit how out-of-control we are, we no longer regard ourselves as exceptions to the rules.
However, whenever we want to relapse, all that the addiction (or the devil, or our own worse self?) needs to say is, “Oh, this time will be an exception. It will be different this time!”
And too often, we fall for this trick—even when we know it’s a trick. Someone has defined insanity as “doing the same stupid thing again, and expecting a different result.” Addiction is a form of insanity.
So, I’m not going to talk anymore about the devil or the addiction or my worse self tricking me. Instead, I’m going to say, “I see where this is going, and I choose not to go there!”
There is an old proverb that is often attributed to the Chinese. But whoever came up with it, thank you very much! Here it is:
“Fool me once, shame on you.
Fool me twice, shame on me.”
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