I get most of my exercise by jumping to conclusions. Let me explain.
I recently heard a man whom I like and appreciate a lot give a talk. He was addressing an important topic. While I agreed with what he was saying, I was rather dismayed that he did not seem to be addressing some real problems and misunderstandings about the topic at hand. I almost emailed him with some of my reservations. I am so glad that I didn’t!
Later, I heard him speak on the topic again. This time, he addressed the very issues that were raised in my heart and mind by his first talk. He pointed out a number of ways in which we can (and often do) abuse the insights that he had given us in his first talk.
Phew! I am so glad that I lingered to listened longer! Jumping to conclusions is not really a healthy form of exercise. In fact, there is an ancient Chinese proverb (which I think I may have made up myself) that says, “Jump to conclusion; fall into error.”
Actually, there is a genuinely ancient proverb that says the following:
“He who gives and answer before listening,
Foolishness it is for him—and shame.” (Proverbs 18:13, my own rather wooden translation from the Hebrew)
In particular, when you don’t understand how someone can believe that something is true—especially when you are certain that the other person is mistaken—you need to not interrupt. In fact, Andy Stanley says that, when the person has paused in what they are saying, you should say to that person, “Tell me more.” Neither Andy Stanley nor I is saying that this is easy to do. However, the two or three times I’ve done it in my lifetime have gone well. I learned something. To be listened to and taken seriously is what most of us crave. (We also too often lust for agreement, but that is another topic for another blog post.)
No one can say everything that needs to be said in one saying. It takes time. So does listening. Going off half-cocked is a good way to shoot yourself in the foot.
So, I plan to cut down on my jumping exercises. I should just cut them out, rather than down. However, we all have to begin somewhere.
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