“Therefore do not pronounce judgment before the time, before the Lord comes, who will bring to light the things now hidden in darkness and will disclose the purposes of the heart. Then each one will receive his commendation from God.” (1 Corinthians 4:5, English Standard Version)
“Who are you to pass judgment on the servant of another? It is before his own master that he stands or falls. And he will be upheld, for the Lord is able to make him stand.” (Romans 14:4, English Standard Version)
I am continuing to explore my own nature. Some of my discoveries are pleasant. Sometimes, I come to a pleasant vista and am blown away by the view.
At other times, I uncover a nest of poisonous snakes. Take yesterday, for example.
A few days ago, I decided that I did not know the Holy Spirit very well at all. God the Father? Yes, a little. Jesus the Son? Somewhat. But the Holy Spirit? Not so much. Yesterday, I realized that this was a serious mistake.
My wife and I were in the car, talking about people who have different ideas about covid vaccines and freedom than we do. I realized that I was assuming that those who don’t agree with my position are simply wrong. I mentioned this to my wife and said, “Well, here’s something else that the Holy Spirit is showing me that I need to work on—making assumptions about other people. I’m going to work on that, but it’s not going to be easy.”
Then we pulled up to a red light. We were in the left turn lane. When the green arrow lit up for our lane, the traffic didn’t move for a long time. (Okay. So maybe it was just three seconds.)
“The driver of the car in front of the line was probably playing with his phone,” I growled.
My wife immediately called me out for making an assumption. “This really isn’t going to be easy,” I replied.
So, a few minutes later, I was standing in line at my favorite restaurant in Sarasota, Yoder’s. I told Sharon to wait in the car while I stood in line. She had been on her feet a lot and was tired. I would call her when I got close to the door. (What a thoughtful husband, right?)
Not long after I got in the long line, a couple of ladies joined me. I turned around and was talking with them when a very tall gentleman quietly stepped in line in front of me. I gave his back a startled and disapproving look and thought about saying something to him. Fortunately, the woman in front of him gave him a little smile, which looked like the sort of smile that a wife would give to her husband who was parking the car while she stood in line. And that is the way it turned out.
“This is not going to be easy at all!” I said to myself. “In fact, it’s going to be really difficult!”
What’s wrong with making assumptions? A lot.
For starters, making assumptions is often (always?) a euphemism for what the Bible calls “judging”. Jesus, the Apostle Paul, James the brother of Jesus, and the book of Proverbs all warn us against making judgments about others. Paul even says that he doesn’t judge himself! (See 1 Corinthians 4:3-4 for further details.)
Another problem with assumptions is that they are shortcuts that avoid the necessary, difficult work of really observing, listening, and thinking through complex issues. And let’s face it: Humans are complex critters. But whether you’re talking about humans or microbes, is there any real shortcut for sustained observation and thoughtful engagement? If there is, I haven’t discovered it yet. Of course, I keep trying.
Then too, making assumptions is a sign of pride. Assuming that we know what motivates others to think and speak and act as they do means that we know them even better than they know themselves. Now, of course, I don’t always understand why I myself think and speak and act as I do, but when it comes to other people . . .
So, I am thinking about starting a new twelve-step program: Assumers Anonymous. We can’t use the letters A.A., because they are already taken. But I assume that we’ll sort out what to call ourselves.
I also assume that there a lot of people who would benefit from such a group.
Oops! There I go again!
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