Posts Tagged: pity

“More Lick than Love”

On July 28, 2018 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

“Sometimes, I think she’s more lick than love,” said my wife.

The “she” of the preceding sentence is our little dog, Laylah.  She likes to lick—a lot!  My wife was trying to hold her, and Laylah was gyrating wildly.  I’m not sure if our nine-month-old puppy was trying to lick my wife’s face or eat my wife’s hair.  (Laylah would also find earrings delicious, I suspect.)

My wife’s comment “. . . more lick than love” set me to thinking.  I wonder if I am not more lick than love in many situations.  Is my love for real?  Are my expressions of love for real?  Am I more lick than love?

Yes, I love my wife, but do I insist on where I want to go out and eat?  Yes, I love my wife, but do I finish up doing the dishes and putting them away?  (She doesn’t like me to soak them for very long.  For some reason, she thinks they should be done in less than four or five hours.  Very strange!)

And there is God.  I sometimes feel affection for God, but am I more lick than love?  What about obedience?  What about character development?  What about encouraging others?  What about humility?

Am I more lick than love when it comes to others? When I see someone in need, do I lick their face with a cheap feeling of pity, or do I love them by meeting their needs?

1 John 3:17 says, “If someone has enough money to live well and sees a brother or sister in need but shows no compassion– how can God’s love be in that person?” (New Living Translation)  John is basically asking, “Are you more lick than love?”

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“PITY RATHER THAN DESTRUCTION”

On October 13, 2017 by Dteb With 0 Comments - down to earth believer

 “Should not, then, this robber, or this adulterer, be destroyed? By no means, but take it rather this way: This man who errs and is deceived concerning things of greatest moment, who is blinded, not in the vision which distinguisheth black and white, but in the judgment which distinguisheth Good and Evil—should we not destroy him? And thus speaking, you shall know how inhuman is that which you say, and how like as if you said, Shall we not destroy this blind man, this deaf man? For if it is the greatest injury to be deprived of the greatest things, and the greatest thing in every man is a Will such as he ought to have, and one be deprived of this, why are you still indignant with him? Man, you should not be moved contrary to Nature by the evil deeds of other men. Pity him rather, be not inclined to offense and hatred, abandon the phrases of the multitude, like “these cursed wretches.” How have you suddenly become so wise and hard to please?”  (Epictetus)

“Frodo: ‘It’s a pity Bilbo didn’t kill Gollum when he had the chance.’

Gandalf: ‘Pity? It’s a pity that stayed Bilbo’s hand. Many that live deserve death. Some that die deserve life. Can you give it to them, Frodo? Do not be too eager to deal out death in judgment. Even the very wise cannot see all ends. My heart tells me that Gollum has some part to play in it, for good or evil, before this is over. The pity of Bilbo may rule the fate of many—yours not least.’”  (J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring.)

This morning, I was thinking about someone for whom I have great contempt.  It isn’t important who.  Fill in the blank, if you like.

Then, I turned “at random” to the above quote from the Stoic philosopher Epictetus.  (Was it truly “at random”?  I doubt it.)

Pity!  Evil deeds show that someone is blind in very significant ways.  The old expression “more to be pitied than censored” comes to mind.

The word “pity” may be related to the word “piety.”  Both words get a bad press these days.  Perhaps they deserve it.  Think, for example, of the exclamation, “I don’t want your pity!”

Then again, maybe both pity and piety need to be brought back from exile.  Perhaps the foundation of human society is pity, which is in turn a crucial aspect of piety.

Perhaps we could begin with our own evil, our own blindness.  Perhaps we could have a little pity toward our own manifest and manifold stupidities.

Admittedly, self-pity can be a really bad thing.  No question about that!  I have often gotten enmeshed in self-pity.  Easy to get into.  Very nearly impossible to get out of!

However, even good things can be abused.  Perhaps it is possible that exercising pity toward myself is appropriate if it is a balanced and appropriate pity.

As a friend of mine said many years ago (when he thought I was being too hard on myself), “You need to get off your own back!”

Perhaps if I got off my own back, I would have the courage to have pity on others as well.

 

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