Posts Tagged: Sarah Koontz

“On Resigning from Being a Professional Advice-Giver”

I was giving my sweetheart unsolicited advice about her driving yesterday. Fortunately, she called me on this practice. Instead of getting defensive, I got quiet and thought about the matter, and I decided that she is absolutely right. That is something I do, especially with her, but not exclusively with her. And it is something that I do a lot.

So, I have decided that just for today, I am not giving anyone any advice. Will I survive? Will they? Maybe. I don’t know.

One thing I know for sure: I don’t like receiving unsolicited advice! Sometimes, I don’t even like the advice for which I’ve asked. This is the case especially when their advice is spot on. Perhaps I should entertain the radical notion that other people don’t like it when I treat them to my amateur “wisdom” either.

In a sense, refusing to be an advice-giver is just one application of Jesus’ broad-spectrum prescription for how to treat other people: “Therefore whatever you want others to do for you, do so for them . . . .” (Matthew 7:12, New American Standard Bible) What I don’t like receiving, I probably shouldn’t be giving.

For some good, simple advice on the giving of advice, you might want to look at some good thoughts from Sarah Koontz at https://livingbydesign.org/biblical-advice-giving/. (And yes, I do see the double-irony in advising you to go to a website that gives you advice about giving—or rather, not giving—advice!)

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