DTEB, “Self-Respect”
Years ago, my long-term sponsor encouraged me to do and live out daily affirmations. It has been, quite literally, a life-changing experience. Here is my 12-step report to my sponsors for today, and my tentative report for tomorrow:
Dear _________ and _____________,
No violations.
Yesterday’s affirmation: “Today, by God’s grace, I am respecting myself, God, others, all living creatures, and even inanimate objects. The word (and song) for today is “R-E-S-P-E-C-T.”
Here is how I think I did with yesterday’s affirmation: I was respectful to myself, God, and others today, for the most part. One thing that I can certainly improve on is thinking (and consequently, speaking) of myself in a more respectful way. My wife pointed out to me yesterday (for the how-many-th time??) that she doesn’t like it when I speak of myself in a put-down-ish manner.
Today’s affirmation: Today, by God’s grace, I am carefully monitoring my thinking and speaking to and about myself. I am thinking positive thoughts about myself, and I am speaking about myself as little as possible. But if I do say something about myself, it is kind.”
I have begun the practice of writing my report for the next day, right after I send the report for the present day. This enables me to think about and plan for the outcomes of my affirmation. I can always revise the draft the next morning, based on what really happened. So, here is my tentative report for tomorrow:
“Here is how I did:
- I did monitor my thinking and actions, based on this affirmation. I committed the affirmation to memory, and frequently repeated it (out loud when I was alone, and mentally when I was with other people).
- When I was inclined to say something negative about myself, I did the Bob Newhart thing, and said, “Stop it!”
- I made the decision to listen more to others, and to talk less about myself. It was great fun! (And I learned a lot more about others, and gave them the invitation to feel respected by my genuine interest in them.)
- I thanked God in my daily gratitude list for 10 good things about myself.”
Here is one thing that I did not include in the rough draft of my report to my sponsors. I will add it.
- At church, I went to the altar, prayed, and emptied myself of everything. I feel light enough today to float away. I know that a breakthrough has to be fleshed out with lots of follow-throughs, and I am determined that, by God’s grace, I will do precisely that. I will empty myself of my past, my regrets, my sins (real and imagined), and myself, as often as I need to do so. Then, I will pray that God will continually fill me with his Holy Spirit and with all goodness.
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