“Social Distancing from Fear”
Social distancing is the current buzz term. And I believe that it is a good thing. However, let me suggest another form of social distancing that might be helpful: social distancing from our fears.
However, we need to be careful not to try to quarantine our fears in an airtight room. They’ll smother to death! And the truth of the matter is that we actually need our fears. They are a gift from God, if you believe in God, as I do. If you don’t believe in God, fears are something given to us by the process of evolution. In any case, fears can be a very good thing. A person, a dog, or a fly that don’t fear anything would soon be a dead person, dog, or fly.
At a recent Zoom tele-meeting, some 12-step friends and I were discussing an important topic: how to avoid turning our emotions (particularly stress and fear) into occasions for acting out in our bottom-line addictive patterns.
I commented as follows: “I need to acknowledge my fears, but I don’t need to invite them in for coffee.”
And then I added, “Sometimes, I stand across the street and have a face to face conversation with my stress and fears. But I do stay on my side of the street. I don’t want my fears to infect me, nor do I want to be a carrier of the fear contagion to others.”
The other day, I encountered a friend on my walk in our community. He was out mowing the yard. We had a nice visit—from across the street.
Perhaps that’s what we should do with our fears: visit in a friendly manner from across the street. Just don’t invite them in for coffee.
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