“The Fine Art of Correcting Someone”
DTEB, “The Fine Art of Correcting Someone”
“Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted.” ( Galatians 6:1, English Standard Version)
Receiving correction from someone gracefully is never easy. Correcting someone else who needs to grow is never easy either. Giving good correction requires thought, practice, and the right mindset. Correcting someone else is an art. Indeed, it is a fine art.
A friend of mine is a supervisor. His boss wanted him to speak to some of his coworkers about some ways they could improve. My friend asked me if I had any tips. Here is what I wrote:
“When you need to give some difficult feedback to others, four things may help you. At least, they have helped me when I have actually done them.
- Expect some resistance and defensiveness. You won’t always get it, thank God! However, that is a normal reaction when someone is hearing that they need to change.
- Assume that the other person really wants to be better and to do better. That is not always a correct assumption, but it is always the correct assumption to make. In fact, it might be good to preface your remarks with some comment such as “I know you want to do the best job you can . . .” and so on.
- Rehearse what you’re going to say beforehand. Ask yourself if you yourself would want someone to speak with you in this way?
- Leave the results in God’s hands.
I think you just helped me write today’s blog post!”
Paul reminded some folks in Galatia (part of what is now the country of Turkey) that they might need to correct someone, but they needed to do so in the right way. The goal is to “restore” or “mend” the person, not to harm them or prove that we are more “spiritual” than the other person is (whatever being “spiritual” might mean).
So, just for today, if you really do need to correct someone, keep these four suggestions in mind. Let me know if they work. Maybe I will use them more often myself.
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