“Standing Up For Our Limits”
“Let what you say be simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything more than this comes from evil.” (Matthew 5:37)
“Now the inner voice of our Higher Power is showing us our limits and encouraging us to stand up for them.” (From Touchstones: A Book of Daily Meditations for Men ©1986, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.)
Standing up for our limits: What an interesting and bizarre thing to do! We usually stand up for our own rights. Occasionally, we stand up for the rights of others. We also stand up and speak up sometimes when we should sit down and shut up.
But standing up for our limits? Really? Is that even a thing?
Yes, it is a thing. Frequently, it is a good thing. I only have so much time. Saying yes to everything and everyone is not a real option, though I often pretend it is. When I do that, I stress myself out trying to keep up with all my yeses. I become resentful about all the things I have to do, even though I’m the one who agreed to do them. As Andy Stanley says, “You were present at every single decision you ever made.” And other people also get stressed out by my unfulfilled (or under-fulfilled) yeses.
Probably the most serious aspect of the matter is that, when I do not stand up for my limits, I neglect people and things that really need and deserve my attention. As someone has said, “When you’re saying yes to one thing, you’re saying no to another.” Recognizing my limits is a way of loving other people, ourselves, and God—all at the same time.
Years ago, I read somewhere that “No,” can be a holy word. That is a form of holiness that I need to pursue with more diligence. You too?
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