“Letting Our Death Inform Our Life”
A week ago today, a horrific event took place in our neighborhood. About 200 yards from where we live, a man murdered his wife. Two days later, he confessed to the crime and took his own life when the police came to arrest him. This has, of course, shaken our quiet community to its core.
What could cause a man to make this kind of decision? Who knows? The desire to control other people, anger when we can’t, our own evil hearts—again I ask, who knows?
The Bible is not an optimistic book when it comes to human nature. According to Jeremiah 17:9-10,
“Jer. 17:9 ¶ The heart is deceitful above all things,
and desperately sick;
who can understand it?”
And then, God answers his own question.
“Jer. 17:10 “I the LORD search the heart
and test the mind,
to give every man according to his ways,
according to the fruit of his deeds.”
I think that the thing that unsettles us/me the most is the unwelcome suspicion that we ourselves might be capable of terrible acts of violence. We like to flatter ourselves with lies about how we would never do such a violent thing. Then, we get in our cars, somebody cuts us off on the interstate and a murderous rage hijacks our brain.
Perhaps one thing that might help us to live better is to realize that this might very well be the last day we get to live. A friend of mine pointed this out in an email just this morning by sending me his thoughts about a reading from the American Indian website “White Bison”:
“Reflection on white bison 8/30- ‘My life is run by choices and decisions. Every choice I make today will carry with it the consequences of that choice. Every decision I make today will carry with it the consequences of that decision. The question I will ask myself today is, ‘Do I want to be happy or do I want to be right?’ Which ever one I choose will have a lot to do with the consequences I will experience today. If today was the last day of my life, what choices and what decisions would I make? Oh Great Spirit, guide my path today and help me see the value of choosing the Red Road.”
My friend goes on, “I love that question about if this was the last day of my life. As much as I’m around death, I feel like I haven’t really asked myself that in a long time. The human feeling that “it can’t happen to me” is persistent. How would I want to live though if it was really my last day? Man, I’d cherish it. I’d want to be present and open and loving. I’d just want to love everyone and everything. Serenity, peace, acceptance, sacred awe, joy, connection, humility, tenderness, vulnerability. That’s the good stuff!”
I’d make the decision to stay in the good stuff. I should try that tomorrow. Remind myself that I’m going to die and let that inform how I live my day.”
Yes indeed! That is the good stuff! And the good stuff, along with the realization that it could well be gone before the day is through, may keep us and other people alive and well for another day.
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